Ignorance is bliss

I never believed in the statement,"Ignorance is bliss." For me it was a statement composed by some loser to get away from reality; for if you close your eyes, world doesn't cease to exist.

Then there is another statement,"Everything is fair in love and war". These days i guess i am moving away from love to war.

So here's how these two statements come together. There is only one way i can move away from love and that way is ignorance.

The reason love had blossomed was because i knew almost everything (atleast that is what i used to think) about her in terms of what she is doing, how her people are, what she is going through, problems in her life, what she likes, what she dislikes, what suites her, what not, who her friends are, her past relationships, her current relationships, her other personal problems, etc etc. I guess the list will never end.

And the reason now it had become a pain, forcing me to move away from it, was because there was no more sharing - the quintessential component of a healthy relationship. And it was decreasing by the day to the point where it became a complete blackout. What was circumstantial initially has now become deliberate. Now i try not to know anything about her and hence an effort to go into a state of ignorance. And the best way to do it is by not looking at her at all. I will not know if there is cut on her lip, what colour her hair is, whether she has grown them or trimmed them, whether she has put on or lost,whether her glasses suit her or not, and most important of all...is she looking happy or sad.


Any particular reason for this ignorance? In my case, well, lemme try and put it this way..for every thing i will get to know about her either through herself or others, i know there will be "others" who will know a lot more..and i cant bear this. Hence ignorance.

And is it a bliss?

To some extent, yes. Pain is a lot less. For all this while, I felt more pain when she had a problem. I dont know what she is going through, so I seek solace in the fact that she is good enough to take care of herself.


But to a great extent, an emphatic NO. Simply because i dont want this ignorance. I want to know what she is going through; i want to reach out; i wanna be there for her. It hurts to be in a state where i dont revel in her laughter; i dont get to know of all the small/silly/stupid but amazingly mine things happening in her life. It might comfort me for most part of the day that i dont know anything about her and i can be happy for myself, but those few minutes when you get the feeling that she might not be alright, that there might be something wrong, make all the happiness a little shallow.

I once heard this saying in hindi," Har kisi ko azbe-aarzo(deepest desire) na mila.... kisi ko hum na mile, koi hume na mila"... After a certain point, i guess you just have to let go..

So is ignorance a bliss? I think i still hold on to my belief," It is a statement composed by some loser to get away from reality"..

May GOD bless her....and may i suffer from permanent amnesia about all of this :)